Thursday, February 09, 2006 || Liz rants. Get used to it.
- I am feeling ...
Okay. =)
I'm still a bit upset, but feeling somewhat pensive and ALRIGHT already. I donno why, but everytime I read other people rant on their blogs, I can't help but raise my eyebrows ... cause most of it freaking drama queen, right?
But I've been ranting so much lately as well. ARgH. And its not even PMS, cuz I never get PMS-sy. These things piss the pants off me, though:
1) Stereotypical, judgemental people.
2) People who whine about their weight, looks etc. (okok, I know I'm guilty of this lately, blarh)
3) ... People who rant too much. (okok, I know I know)
4) People who critisize me. I'm sorry, but I'm quite prideful + egoistic, so I don't take criticism very well, even if its constructive criticism. (Unless I asked for it, haha)
Fwah, damn emo. I hate feeling this way. Like, I don't know HOW to release all this energy and frustration in me. Food? Maybe. But mostly, I just write in my diaries and shit ... I mean, that's the best way I release all this shit. Most effective also.
Anyway, my parents fall into category 1) ... Sad, but true. Of course, I don't really blame them, they are too conventional and too set in their ways, and the ways of 'normal' people. For instance, if I suddenly started blasting metal goth, growling music on my stereos (I know some ppl seriously dig this genre), they'd just assume that I joined some kinda satanic cult for troubled teenagers. And they'd blame my friends, etc bla bla as well.
Speaking of stereotypical people, I'm here to rant, again. I dont give a damn if its hypocritical of me (since I hate ranters).
So anyway, I was at this restaurant, with Jac and another guy. And then, this ... pretty big-sized woman (actually VERY big sized lah) walked in. And on the other table, this bunch of guys started sniggering and laughing when she walked pass. So fucking mean, right? (of course, Jac and the guy were laughing too, Err. Oh well.)
I have NEVER met a girl that has never been self-conscious about her weight before. (Uh, Jaclyn not included.) Actually, I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say this, almost all of us girls have puked, or reconsidered puking after eating. I don't even know why we do it; I think it's because that being fat is so unacceptable and even taboo.
Because, it is the common knowledge that when you're fat, people say things like:
"I will NOT date her, she's so fat EW!"
"Oh my gosh, *insert name* should seriously diet lah. She is, like, obese .. no wonder don't have boyfriend."
"Maybe she'll be not bad looking if only shes not that fat ..."
So, because of what society expects from us, from what YOU guys want from us, we have no choice but be, like, thin.
And some of us, sooner or later, we'll just end up looking like
Which is like, seriously fking scary. Because girls who look like they'll break into half when you're humping them are scary.
Ugh, I feel bad for that woman. I can't imagine people laughing at me that way, I think I'd kill them. Thank God I dont give a flying cow about my weight (though I complain ever now and then), cause I'll rather be fat and happy than thin and suicidal, thank you very much. I heard that if you're anorexic, you get a LOT of mood swings and get suicidal all the time, cause your body image is THAT low.
Damn, I want salmon. Ish.
Another bunch of doltish assholes are people who can't accept u for who you are. Actually, I secretly think that these people are actually the most insecure type, and that they secretly can't accept THEMSELVES, which is why they have this ability to find faults with friends, bfs, family members etc.
I have a friend, she and her bf breaks up EVERY DAY. And get back together EVERY DAY. It's like, this freaking cycle, man. And I've listened to their conversations before, the only conversation they ever have, is to accuse each other of seeing other guys or girls. Wtf, people?
And they scream at each other all the time as well. Like, seriously SCREAM, you know? I don't freaking understand how can people scream at each other on the phone. I mean, it's so weird, no eye contact, body language and etc. I have never screamed at anybody on the phone before, because even if I'm really pissed, I'll just find some lame excuse and get off the phone ... and call back later when I'm less annoyed.
I dont think I will ever have a boyfriend. I'm not built to have a relationship. Because half the time, I don't even really bother because I'm not used to controlling people or being controlled. So if some guy I dated wanted to hang out with other girls ... I think I wouldn't be pissed, like most girls would. O_o Or if he said he wanted to rob a bank, I'd probably get excited and ask him to bring me along.
fwah, no wonder I always fall for nerds. Or those good good type that don't want to date girls because they want to study or whatever.
I'm so happy I'm single. The only problem I have in life, right now, is the whole parent thing. And my SPM results, which in actuality I don't even really give a damn about it.
